


Crepes Have Nothing on Us

by morrezela



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Crack, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Inanimate Objects, Crack, M/M, Multi, Pancakes, Threesome - M/M/M, Weirdness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-17
Updated: 2015-03-17
Packaged: 2018-03-18 06:26:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3559472
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/morrezela/pseuds/morrezela
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Misha and Jensen are an established Pancake/Hotcake couple. Jared is the flapjack batter lusting after Hotcake!Jensen. The lusting is mutual.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crepes Have Nothing on Us

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: The people mentioned herein belong to themselves. This is a pure and utter work of fiction. Not a teeny, tiny drop of it is real.
> 
> Warnings: Jealousy, sort of infidelity, weird pancake sex
> 
> A/N: This was written for the second round of spn_masquerade. As some of you know, I usually fill the inevitable Castiel/Food Item prompt that gets left for Blindfold then Masquerade. Unfortunately my Cas/Food Crack Nonny didn’t visit this round, so I went for the next best thing – pancake sex.
> 
> All mistakes you find are my own

Jared seethes as he slowly browns, turning from batter to tasty, fluffy flapjack. He is bigger than hotcake, far bigger even than the younger than hotcake, pancake. 

Oh. Pancake. Jensen, as pancake likes to be called, is the most beautiful shade of golden brown. He has tiny, darker flecks of brown from where the maker dusted cinnamon over his uncooked batter. Jensen is the most beautiful pancake that Jared has ever seen in his 13 minutes of life, watching as cake after cake is applied to the griddle.

But, alas, Jensen is with Misha the hotcake. Jared can see the way that Misha’s batter leaks into Jensen’s sides even though the maker spaces them far apart on the griddle. He can’t help but think about how he should’ve been the one to merge into Jensen’s fluffy, welcoming sides.

Instead, Misha bubbles away, happily cooking into Jensen. It’s enough to make Jared have airbubbles before his batter even hits the hot, buttered griddle.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jensen is happy with his status. He isn’t fully cooked yet, but he will be. And he’ll be eaten while hot, he just knows it. Misha is good, but Jensen can’t help craving something more. He has known since he spotted Jared in the mixing bowl that he was going to be a big boy.

Jensen wasn’t wrong. Jared is huge and thick and completely out of Jensen’s reach. His edges have such good definition that Jensen develops a tiny lump at the last minute of cooking. Jared is the hottest flapjack that Jensen has seen come off the griddle.

Misha knows about Jensen’s lusts. There is no way he could be ignorant of Jensen’s lusts with the way that their batter is joined together. Even when their connection is broken as they’re moved from griddle to plate, Misha is stacked on top of Jensen. They’re too close together to have secrets.

Then, then Jared is put on a plate next to them. Jensen wants to say hello, but before he can, the maker starts slathering butter over Jared’s hot, warm surface. This is followed by a thin layer of Syrup.

Jensen doesn’t think that his pancake life could get better, but he is wrong. He is lifted out of the pile that he is in with Misha and dropped onto Jared’s slick, sticky surface. It’s heaven, especially as his topside is rubbed with soft butter and syrup as well.

Misha follows after, weighting down on top of Jensen, making him sandwiched between the two hottest cakes ever to be made in the kitchen. Misha settles down on Jensen, pressing their combined weight onto Jared’s warm, giving surface.

But while Jared is fluffy and no doubt has a delicate flavor, his crust pushes up with purpose into Jensen’s welcoming body. The feel of being pushed into from both sides makes Jensen just want to lay there and take in all of the glorious flapjack and hotcake attention that he can. 

A cascade of syrup comes pouring down over their sides, binding the three of them into a sticky mess. Jensen both feels and hears Jared’s soft squish of bliss and contentment. They are the best full stack of pancakes to ever be made. 

The crepes rolled up in their silly little rolls, sides barely touching? They had nothing on them.


End file.
